ALL FALL DOWN

Sunset With Pink Clouds and Birds 035 (1024x768) (2)

Before I fell out of my chair watching Downton Abbey,

I photographed pink clouds rising from a falling sun.

I swirled my hips to Persian music

as my hands made intricate circles above my head.

Before I fell

my dance was telling me stories of my healing body.

Hope bloomed in my mind

the way pink clouds bloom from a falling sun.

I did have a fall as I rose from my chair two Sundays ago, and managed to stay in denial until Friday. Though I felt that things were not right, I managed to function normally until small signals turned into excruciating spasms of pain. No more denial. Back on the pain medication through the weekend to ward off spasms and relax my anxious mind. On Monday my doctor found no broken bones on the x-rays, and surmised from testing my arm and gauging my pain that I could have a tear. Yet, together we decided against an MRI: We both knew that I was not a good candidate for another surgery. We decided that rest, medication and a return to rehab after a week was the best way to go.

So today I find myself surrendered again…to one day at a time as free of expectations as I can be. Well…I may allow myself just one pink cloud of hope

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2 Responses to “ALL FALL DOWN”

  1. Gel Says:

    Oh! a fall…..sorry that happened. And the set back. Something to turn into a lesson(?)….or a teacher?

    I’m listening to how you navigate these things. I have an aging body too, and some issues that flare and greatly reduce my movement options. Yet I am a dancer and I chose to see these “set backs” as opportunities…a new movement score. In the NOW.

    Pink clouds of hope are good indulgences.

  2. leiflife Says:

    Certainly an opportunity to live with what has occurred… To be more mindful of my body…not just when I dance. And a door may have opened; not to be spoken of yet. Thank you for your empathy, and for your own courage. Glad you approve of pink clouds of hope.

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